Monday, August 28, 2006

is that what it's all about?

some time ago, a good friend came to me to lament and complaint about his gf. seems like they have a lot of issues with each other, but are always sweeping them under the carpet without resolving any of it. he even used the word 'hate' to describe the feelings he sometimes felt for his gf! on my part, i kept telling him to have a good talk with her, a real heart-to-heart talk that doesn't involve shouting, insult-hurling or blind accusations. just lay everything out on the table and analyse their r/ship in detail. of course, that's easier said than done, coz humans have emotions and r/ship is a particularly emotional topic as it involves matters of the heart.

but i kept stressing to him that they need to solve their existing issues before they bring the r/ship to another level. if not, it would only get from bad to worse. mind u, i'm not teaching him to break-up with his gf or anything. it's just that those issues would not go away by itself and as time goes by, more issues would pile on one on top of the other and matters would eventually get out of hand.

then recently, he told me that they're getting married. and apparently, he's too much of a coward to bring up their issues to his gf. so they're just gonna bring their issues into their marriage and probably would eventually hand it down to their offsprings.

so is this what marriage is all abt? just because a couple has been together for some time, their next step would be marriage? in my friend's case, i think their matrimonial decision is due to external pressure. a lot of eyes are on them... but still! does that justify putting our happiness on the line, just for the sake of how others are judging us? does that justify jeopardizing our next generation's happiness?

call me a hopeless romantic, but what happened to marriages based on LOVE?